Love: Accepting not Expecting

Real love means, you’re not asking for any exchange and accepting the person you love for who they are.

There are people always asking me, “why you do that kind of effort? it’s a man’s task” My answer is, “I am happy for what I used to do, I love to see him smile and happy, I want to do such things like my efforts because this is my way on showing and made him feel special.”

Everyone have their own way in expressing their love to someone, and this is my own way. I just love the feeling when I made him feel so happy. Effort is not just be accomplished by a Man for his Girl, but it should be both part.

Effort is not just something you give in special ways but its something we can do in everyway.

Effort in time. For me this is the most important effort in a relationship. Personally, I always appreciate the time that my GG (God’s Gift means Boyfriend) always gave for me. We have a complicated schedule and we just see each other twice a week. One, in our service; two, whenever we have time over the weekdays. I really wanted to honor him for being responsible on managing his time, though I know how he really sacrifice his sleep just to see me. Effort in time, includes the time you spend in texting/chatting/call for just knowing his/her situation or updating each other. Effort in time, when you’ll be there for him/her whenever he/she needs you.

Effort in presents. For me this is only optional. I believe that if you love someone you will be contented of whatever he/she can give you. You’ll never be expecting in exchange for what you can give. I learned that love and effort in time is enough, because love is everything. Material things or effort in gifts/presents are just a bonus, like what I’ve said, we have our own way of expressing our feelings to others, so it’s up to them on how they will do it. I also learned that if you are expecting or asking things  from him, it is not love at all, because if you love someone you will accept whatever he/she can do and it will be enough for you. But, it is still depends and a case to case basis.

Many said that he is lucky on me, and I always said that I am much luckier and blessed for having him. They just saw the physical effort I did for him, but they did not saw how he contribute in my growth, though he didn’t do such kind of cheesy effort but how he do the effort of spending time even if it’s hard and complicated, effort in giving me advises, effort in asking me for a date and effort in motivating me and keeping me more positive and mostly, effort in ignoring me, for he don’t want to tolerate my attitude and allowing me to realized my fault.

Sometimes, we cannot see the good side because we are just looking for what is trending. We are being one sided. But when we look on the deeper part – just like for me, I do such efforts for my GG because he gave me so much love and happiness, for me that is enough to think that he deserved a different kind of efforts from me.

There is no such perfect relationship. But the important things are: love, trust, understanding, patience and honesty. There are misunderstanding that comes your way but if you have the love, trust, understanding, patience, and honesty there’ll be no broken relationship. Most importantly, put God in the center of your relationship and just let Him move you so you’re in a right path.


Thanks for reading,

Gela Nicolas


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